Rethinking funerals with Andrew Judd (NAFD) 

Direct cremation is taking significant market share. How is this trend forcing traditional funeral directors to rethink their business models, especially regarding high fixed costs like premises and fleets? 

Andrew Judd: Change is nothing new in the funeral sector. It has evolved for 120 years, alongside changing attitudes toward death. It’s crucial not to confuse preserving what’s important about grief and saying goodbye with obstructing natural shifts in consumer behaviour. People want control, especially when facing the loss of a loved one. 

While consumer preferences change, the core necessities of a funeral director haven’t. Deceased people cannot move themselves; they must be cared for with respect and dignity. This requires investment in mortuary facilities, refrigeration (especially with longer gaps between death and funerals) and specialised vehicles. These are high fixed costs, but they are essential for safeguarding the deceased. Good funeral directors will continue to invest in these unseen – but vital – aspects of their service. They should also confidently advocate for this investment to their clients, reassuring them of the professional, respectful care their loved one receives. 

Insight: It’s vital funeral directors communicate the value they add behind the scenes.

Has the public fallen out of love with the “traditional” funeral? Do we need an overhaul as consumer desires change? 

AJ: “Traditional” is relative. Funeral customs have always evolved. The narrative often compares today’s needs to a “Victorian” standard, but funerals must reflect the life lived. A funeral is for everyone impacted by the death – the deceased, the family and the wider community. 

The key is ensuring families know they don’t have to subscribe to a “Victorian norm.” They can say goodbye in a way that feels personal and comfortable. Informed choice is vital, and local funeral directors are best placed to guide families through these possibilities, long before a death occurs. You don’t have to have a funeral, but the need to say goodbye is universal. 

Insight: Funeral directors should empower families to make informed, personal choices.

How can local funeral directors compete with the marketing budgets of large, online national providers, especially those promoting low-cost, no-fuss options? 

AJ: Local funeral directors need to be more visible and proactive. They are respected in their communities but often not personally known until they are needed. They need to engage with community life outside times of sadness. This could involve holding sessions, virtual or in-person, to open discussions about death in a normal, non-threatening way. Being a familiar face, a person people can talk to 24/7, is a unique value that national providers cannot replicate. 

Insight: Funeral directors must become visible, familiar faces in their communities.

Is there a better way to articulate the psychological and emotional value of an attended funeral in the age of direct cremation? 

AJ: Absolutely. Grief is the price of love, and the need to say goodbye is a fundamental part of our humanity. We saw the damaging legacy of “unfinished business” during COVID when people were denied the chance to say goodbye properly. A ceremony, call it a “goodbye” if “funeral” is too heavy, provides essential touchpoints – seeing the coffin, the hearse, the final curtain close. These moments help define the reality of loss and aid psychological acceptance. Skipping this can have long-term consequences. 

A great example of facilitating this need to say goodbye, even with an unattended cremation, comes from past NAFD president John Adams. A family he served wanted no funeral but still felt a need to mark the moment. John arranged for the hearse to stop outside the family home. The many grandchildren each placed a single flower on the coffin before it quietly departed. The family had their moment of farewell, on their terms. 

Insight: Articulate the long-term consequences of not saying goodbye. 

Does the word “funeral” carry too much baggage? Should funeral directors use more inclusive language like “celebration of life”? 

AJ: It’s a valid point. What is a funeral? Is it gathering for support? A ritual with liturgy? The final act with the body? The most important part is gathering to remember and support each other. This doesn’t have to happen in a church or crematorium. It can be in a hotel, a pub, a golf club – anywhere meaningful. 

Focusing on the “event” – who to invite, what to eat, sharing stories – can make it feel more like a life event similar to a wedding or a significant birthday. You can still blend in traditional elements, like the hearse attending for a final farewell before a separate committal. This unbundling of the gathering from the disposal of the body offers huge flexibility for personalisation. 

Barry Pritchard, our immediate past president, is a great example of this thinking with his London business, Exit Here. He operates it with a restaurateur, and the entire concept focuses on the gathering and the hospitality. By shifting the focus to the event, you can build a meaningful experience that still incorporates the necessary elements of a funeral. 

Insight: Reframing the funeral as a personalised life event can make it feel less like a traditional obligation.

What about “buyer’s remorse” for those who chose an unattended cremation and later regret it? Can funeral directors help? 

AJ: Yes, we hear this firsthand. All is not lost. Funeral directors can help unpick what was missed and create a separate event, perhaps centred around the ashes. It can be a light-hearted gathering focused on hospitality and sharing memories. You only get one chance to say goodbye, so it’s vital to get it right. If the moment passed without a proper farewell, a creative funeral director can still help a family find a meaningful way to mark the life and connect with each other. 

Insight: Proactively seek to assist families to find whatever way to say goodbye. 

Who are key allies for funeral directors to promote the value of attended funerals? 

AJ: Think about venues, event planners and caterers. Hospitality is a huge part of saying goodbye in many cultures. Also, look to digital companies that can enhance personalisation through high-quality AV, live streaming for those who can’t attend, and digital memorialisation. These tools create an immersive experience that facilitates connection and leaves a lasting legacy. 

Insight: Funeral directors should build alliances with a range of players to demonstrate the value of gathering to say goodbye.